Honestly, if the Nikkei doesn’t go up another 200% I shan’t be able to buy a new mega-yacht this year. Well, I suppose we all must make sacrifices whilst our nation is in the financial straits that it is.
Salutations, dear friends. For those who are new to this land I am Marlowe Edmund Blackwell VI, your host and the symbol of this pantheon of rhythmic conversation. Please sit back and relax. Since we’ve last met, I hired a young, unemployed English teacher to craft my memoirs for me. I pay him in Jameson, kimchi, and leftover escargot and he seems to survive. You’ll find this excerpt most pleasing.
“As I discussed matters of life, beauty, and English romanticism with Gorbachev and a Mister Adam Sessler, that dastardly Putin chimed in claiming that ‘Romantic Science’ couldn’t possibly be the movement we make it out to be because the very idea of it is a contradiction in terms. The gall. Before I could craft my eloquent yet stern reply, the singers had become. Of them, two gentlemen captured the room. Encapsulating our souls, our being in their soothing voices. I made haste to speak to them after they had finished. We discussed music for hours, going into its most philosophical depths while the other kept traipsing on about sludge metal. I hired them on to become a part of my new musical endeavor that would soon become Mind Equals Blown.”
Glorious isn’t it? Yes, Mr. Testa and Master Altomari have proven to be invaluable assets but if I have to hear ‘musical universalism’ and ‘sludge metal’ in the same breath one more time, I might just lose my composure. I would’t wish my plights on anyone.
Now, as for why you’re here. My gardener has been making quite a fuss over this Yeezus fellow. He sounds like a popular fellow considering he features God on one of his tracks. Yes, Jason employed me to arrange for another one of our collaborative brief reviews. Luckily for him, the Dalai Lama couldn’t make it to our weekly tea so here you go, the six-word reviews of my servants, squatters, and squires.
Joe Ballard: “No holds barred Kanye, frontloaded album.”